Get Drunken Updates in Your Email!

Your email address:


Powered by FeedBlitz

Thursday, July 20, 2006

The Funniest Man on the Planet...You Know...Besides Me

For the better part of the last ten years, I have been laughing along with a fellow by the name of Kevin Smith. From the first time I rented Mallrats, until last night, when I watched Clerks for the millionth time, the man keeps me in stitches. Incidentally, now is the perfect time to throw some props to my man Sean, otherwise known as the Analog Roosevelt, Cronkite the Barbarian, or whatever name he is currently going under. Sean and went to high school together and after Darren and I saw Mallrats and started suggesting it to our friends, it was Sean that told us it was part of a "trilogy." He was talking about the Jersey Trilogy, three films, Clerks, Mallrats, and Chasing Amy that were set in the same world, and featured some of the same characters including Jay and Silent Bob. The duo would go on to be featured in Dogma and Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. Sean, I can't thank you enough for turning me on to these films.

Tomorrow, the latest opus from this master of comedy comes to a theatre near you. Clerks 2 (clever title right). I'm hear to tell you why you need to get your butt in the seat.

TEN REASONS TO SEE CLERKS 2:

1. What other filmmaker could put a poop monster in a film about religion and make it all make sense?

2. Two Words...Snootchie Bootchies.

3. M. Night Shyamalan doesn't need any more money, and besides his name is too long.

4. How else will we ever get a sequel to Jersey Girl?

5. It may not have snakes on a plane, but Clerks 2 does have a donkey in a compromising position.

6. No one since the Reynolds, has grown a mustache quite like Jason Lee.

7. Let's find out if Jason Mewes is still funny without the drugs (Robin Williams wasn't). I just playin' Mewes!

8. Just to prove Joel Siegal wrong.

9. Kevin's wife is a beautiful lady, we should show props when a man has such bedroom skills ('cause let's face it, she's not with him for his looks).

and the final reason you should go see Clerks 2...

10. My name is in the credits! Seriously, that's how cool this fool is. Kevin ran a contest on MySpace, to give 10,000 fans a chance to have their name in the credits of his film. And I'm one of them. Jealous?

Now, this movie (or any of Kevin's films, minus Jersey Girl) is not necessarily for everyone. It is rated R, mostly for language and gratuitous amounts of potty humor, but that's right up my alley. Mom, Tara, you guys might want to sit this one out, but for most of you, I think you'll find that beneath all the dirty jokes, and pop culture references Kevin Smith is a guy with something to say. Clerks 2 in theatres this weekend, don't miss it...unless you're my mom. Then ignore this message.

3 comments:

K E L L E N said...

I thought you'd want to read this joel. The internet is awesome.

Kevin Smith lashed out at Joel Siegel after the movie critic stormed out of a screening of Clerks II during a scene where the characters are discussing hiring woman to perform sexual favors on a donkey. Siegel got out of his seat and yelled: "Time to go! First movie I've walked out of in 30 [bleeping] years!" In response, Kevin Smith wrote on his MySpace:

"Getting a bad review from Siegel is like a badge of honor. This is the guy who stole his mustachioed-critic shtick from Gene Shalit years ago, and still refuses to give it back. This is a guy who seemingly prides himself on his own nyuk-nyuk wordplay. For 'Pirates 2,' he made us all titter with 'Yo, Ho, Ho and a Bottle of Fun' . . . He made us squeal with delight when he wrote, 'Wheelie Good Time for "Cars." ' I mean, Fozzy [bleeping] Bear laughs at this guy."
And there's more: "I don't need Joel Siegel to [bleep] my [bleep] the way he apparently [bleeps] M. Night Shyamalan's, gushing over his flick ['The Lady in the Water'] before he's even seen it, but [bleep] man, man - how about a little common [bleeping] courtesy? You never, never disrupt a movie, simply because you don't like it. Cardinal rule of moviegoing: Shut your [bleeping] mouth while the movie's playing.

"I don't come down to your job and slap the taste out of your mouth for coming up with a line like, ' "Shark Tale" Is a Halibut Good Time' - so don't [bleep] with my stuff while it's still screening . . . What are you, a 12-year-old boy cutting loose with your pals at a Friday night screening of 'Scary Movie' 4' while your parents are in a theater down the hall watching 'The Devil Wears Prada'? Leave the diva-like behavior and drama-queen antics to the movie stars, not the movie reviewer, ya' rude-ass [bleep]."

K E L L E N said...

btw credit goes to thesuperficial.com for the find

K E L L E N said...

http://hedonistica.com/yt.php?path=http://www.youtube.com/v/vgYhLIThTvk

kevin smith interview about superman. I think you'll really like this too man.