All The World's a Stage...But Especially the Parts Where You Perform Plays

While a lot of my online friends and loyal readers are familiar with the goings on in the "business called show," I know that there are some that aren't. I also am currently knee deep in it, and that's what I want to write about today, so there!

In the professional world there is very little time for rehearsals. In repertory theatres the rehearsal period is generally a week or two during the day while the current show runs at night. Off Broadway shows may be work-shopped for decades, but once they actually begin the rehearsal process they go quickly into previews.

College theatre is a little different. The main obstacle to such a quick turn around is that the actors, technicians, crew etc. are all students and therefore largely unavailable for work and rehearsals during the day. This extends the process, generally with three to five weeks of rehearsals, followed by a week or two of performances. "Zorro" is roughly on this schedule.

The first week of rehearsals is often used for "table work". This consists of line readings between the actors, discussion about characters' motivations, accents and physicality with the director, and maybe some early blocking. Blocking, at its most basic, is the process of deciding where to stand and where to walk while saying your lines. Some of it is organic (ie. If I said this, I'd want to do this), some is pre-determined by the director (I want a certain visual image at this moment) and some is trial and error (you can't walk there, 'cause I'll trip over your gown).

That's how the first week would go for most shows. "Zorro" is not like most shows, however. When we're done, "Zorro" will run just less than two and half hours. Probably two hours of that will involve some level of physical interaction (dancing, fighting, whipping, physical comedy). With so much physicality inherent in the show the emphasis (even this early) has to be on actor training and preparation. So instead of discussing character motivations and reading lines for the first four or five rehearsals, we're blocking out fights, learning stage combat techniques and training with new weapons. This brings us to the bullwhip.

I'm a pretty cool guy. I'm funny, intelligent and charismatic. I've sold cars, answered phones, acted at the community, collegiate, and professional levels. I've been trained in hand to hand combat techniques, am handy with a broadsword, knife, rapier and dagger and very good with a quarterstaff. And now I know how to use a whip.

I also have arms of Jello...after having thought about it, they may not like me using their product name. Let's just say I have arms of gelatin dessert. Saturday morning was my first training session and after about forty-five minutes worth of whip work I was feeling pretty good about myself. Then came Monday night. I spent the better part of two and a half hours with a whip in my hand, and it darn sure wasn't just danglin' there.

There is a very specific crack that the director wants me to learn for the show. I'll be beating a peasant, and it needs to look painful, while not actually being so. It's not an easy crack to learn, but after just two days of work I'm getting the hang of it. Not only am I going to be hilariously funny in this role, (at times at least) I'm gonna look like a badass. Woohoo for me!

Tonight I'm called at 7:30 for more whip work, so chances are that by tomorrow my arms will be literally be too sore to raise to this keyboard. But the payoff at the end of April will be sweet! Thanks to everybody who has sent me well-wishes and congrats for getting back on stage. It has been a while, but once I'm there it feels like I've never left. I guess there will always be a little bit of the actor in me. And now there's a little bit of the Whip in there too.

Marital Problems

The title of this post is a cheap shot. No, Mrs. Rogue and I aren't really having problems. But we might after she finds out how madly in love I am with a man by the name of Tim Kring. Who is this mystery man, and what has he done to win my affections? He's the writer behind shows like "Crossing Jordan" and "Chicago Hope" as well as films like "Teen Wolf Too." So, I'm in love with the guy who created "Teen Wolf Too"? Yes...and no. I do have a serious man-crush on Timmy, but not because of his excellent work with Jason Bateman. He's been busy recently with a little show called "Heroes" and last night, his "little show" put on the best hour of television in years.

"Heroes" is (as I've described it to friends) what would have happened if Stan Lee created the X-Men after watching "Unbreakable" by M. Knight Shymalan. Gritty, realistic, exciting and damn good television. Using comic book methods like cliffhanger "to be continued..." storylines and camera angles that Alex Ross would appreciate, "Heroes" has brought the enduring archetypes of superheroes to the small screen, and to mainstream America.

The characters that Kring and his team introduce us to are not two dimensional. They have thoughts and feelings, hidden motivations and alliances, and act based upon their circumstances, not some idyllic sense of right or wrong. They are real people. Or about as close as television comes to them anyway. Is it Shakespeare? No. Does it go as far towards creating its own language as "Deadwood" did? No. Does it tackle societal questions every week like "Battlestar Galactica"? Not quite. Is it consistently compelling television, significantly more entertaining than any other genre show on TV? Yep. Without a doubt, including "Lost" and the aforementioned "BSG". It's that good. Or at least it is now.

You'll notice I'm not talking about specifics. That's because this show is far too good to spoil (especially last night's episode). If you are not watching this show, do yourself a favor and jump on the bandwagon. The ratings are just going to go up which means if you are not already missing out talking about this show with your co-workers you will be soon. It's classic water cooler stuff. But Joel, you ask, how do I catch up now? Log on to your computer and watch the episodes for free on NBC.com, or buy them from iTunes, or heck download them illegally (not that I condone that kind of thing) just do what you have to do to catch up with this show. The good news is, you've got some time to do it. After next week's episode (which looks to be almost as good as this week's) "Heroes" goes on hiatus until late April before wrapping up the season with five episodes week after week. So, get cracking. You've got two months to figure who these "Heroes" are and why Joel might want to marry their creator.